Taking a break today Having a day off After the crazy week I’ve had Ready so ready to to feel a peace of mind move past this I’ve been spending me time dwelling on where I was what I wanted It doesn’t matter I need to let it goo I’m ready to do this but having a hard time doing it
Starting to get sick again… Felt that feeling I used to get When I was in the shower this morning I’m praying to God to give me the strength to get past this… But this is kinda bad Breath just focus on keeping breakfast down
Slowly forgotten but never lost
If only if only
What if I just threw my hands up in the air gave up on this 2 year endeavour I’m working on and just gave in to you. Would you give in to me to. If I stood in your doorway and said this is what I want would you try would you fight how would you feel. If I graduated and came back would you still be there…. if I came to visit would you let your gaurd down with me and just be be in the...
Eh I miss home so bad right now I want to be physically sick… eh why is this stupid textbook making me relive everything I try so fucking hard to forget Don’t get sick please don’t get sick not this again o thought I already worked past this ….. No one to call… No one cares…. sigh breath breath your alone relax No ones home it’s okay to cry…
Doing homework till forever see you in a few years blah love getting invites to parties up north I miss my friends so much
Starting to pick my old dieting way
Hoping 109 hits soon
It’s pretty cool when I go to work and wait an hour for everyone else to arrive because I don’t have a key blah….
I wanna be a girl who doesn’t need a man to feel complete in her life :) I wanna be the girl you always wanted and the only one you’ll ever want Haha kinda opposites huh :P
Muffin and coffee
I kinda like my mornings Eating my breakfast alone It’s just peaceful Watching the sunrise
You is kind. You is smart. You is important.– The help
Last night I went to your house I came in You were there waiting like you knew I was going to be there We didn’t even say two words to each other You walked over to me I stopped breathing You picked me up and laid me on the floor It was like nothing had ever happened ….. Then I woke up…… Shit
Drink a sip Completely blind Drink some more Fight with someone No reasoning with me I leave the bar I can’t even see the lines Call a friend So I stay alive Made it home Rest in bed Call a friend Rest my head
Yellow submarine sunglasses hmmm… Having my eyes dilated
Heels every day of the week ;)
Haha pickles always makes the day better
Peaceful places Suzanne’s house watching old movies and eating my favorite cookies Screaming screaming don’t don’t sink down to his level … Breath Breakfast and coffee on the porch After everyone is gone Breath. he doesn’t stop…. Positive place Sitting on the beach letting the sun touch my skin :) Sleeping under my new white comforter I have...
So sick of all the fighting so sick of all the yelling …… peaceful please think peaceful place..
Got all dressed up now there’s no where to go …. guess I’m going home Possibly going skydiving next month I love groupon
I’m thinking that it might be time to say goodbye to you. I’ve tried really hard to do it your way and it’s just not working out I’m not saying this is forever just right now I think this is what I need to do and I’m sorry. I love you….
Feeling a little outta place today kinda wishing you were here. It’s good to know your happy and doing well but there is apart of me idk how big that wishes you still cared. I wonder what would have or could have been I know I shouldn’t do that but honestly I know the current situation and I know that it doesn’t matter what if because this is what it is and nothing in the current moment is...
In side my head there are voices Voices that won’t stop screaming They contemplate things that were Things that could have been Things that are And things they want It never stops All day they bicker no battle is ever won No one voice ever achieves the upper hand It’s just there’s a longing in my heart A longing in my body that won’t go away It craves to have you near The voices were at...
God is testing me sigh Im way stronger than this just wish… wishing is stupid it won’t change anything things are what they are for a reason right now not sure what it is but that’s the way it is sure things can change but it takes more than one person to make something happen and I really need to start focusing on things that are in my control instead of the things that are out of my control…...
Time to write something so here it is
Everyday I feel you beside me Resting my head on your chest Thinking about past times and ex lovers Life continued and we stayed friends You changed alot from the last time I saw You. It didn’t matter though You still expelled happiness everywhere You went You took me out of the ditch I had dug myself And kept my mind busy Gave me someone to care for And I honestly did care for you...
Writing this somewhere helps keep it off my mind…
So fucking annoyed sigh….. can you please get this over with so I can spill me heart out…..
Take the pills Let them take over Rest your head easy Another restless night Sleepless sometimes Doubling the dose The nightmares slowly fade Off in the distance Rest your head easy tonight Nightmares blocked or Rather inhibited My thoughts are fading Finally there’s silence The shades are closing I’m surrounded by darkness There’s no fear no monsters This one...
Shower, give dog a bath, eat something, read textbooks….. go!
This body Stale and fragile Skin is easily broken Bones splinter under pressure Age catching up Sight loses clearity Black hazy Void Sounds now silenced Past priorities Nothing but a memory Which will be forgotten Once familiar faces become strangers Hope is lost Nothing left Just a wait for death to show up at the door
I didn’t want to part ways like this Thought it could be more cordial if it every happened After all the things you first told me I never thought this would happen Maybe this is what needs to happen
I wish I could save every bs thing you ever said to me so when you finally come to apologize I can give you all the reasons im not going to
Now and then I think of all the times you screwed me over Part of me believing it was always something that I’d done But I don’t wanna live that way Reading into every word you say You said that you could let it go
Honestly screaming and no one can hear……. thinking I need to take something stronger to get through this night
One. Day. At. A. Time.
In complete shock about to have a mental break down
My head is unable to focus I get dizy I breath deeply Gasping for air Feels like suffocation … My hands start losing control I grab hold Digging nails deep I can’t control Biting my lip You kiss me softly On my neck I just lose it
Not sure it’s worth it… I want to but… never knowing what kind of a response I’ll get can make it not worth it
Just take one pill and let sleep take over nights are the worst…
Really annoyed….. I guess that comes with the territory
Time to rest your head easy and let the sleep take over. There’s a little satisfaction but slight disappointment but it’s a step a small step in the right direction. And for that I can truly rest easy tonight it may take a while but patience and perseverance have proved on my side this night so I will put my faith once more in people once more the weight of the world does not need to...
I’m in total shock…
I said happy Easter to everyone I wanted to except you… and that idea that I don’t feel comfortable knowing if it’s okay to talk to you makes me sick. I wonder how long this will go on for who will cave first if there’s even a part of you that feels uncomfortable about this too I’m not sure and honestly idk if I’ll ever find out….